You may dread having to sit your children down and tell them about you and your ex-spouse’s divorce.
Avoiding the topic can leave you feeling more and more nervous as time goes on. Talking honestly and staying truthful while discussing this topic can help.
Be direct and truthful
According to Psychology Today, you should keep any negative details about your ex-spouse to yourself as you talk to your children. Make your explanation about why you both are getting divorced simple and direct, as well as age-appropriate.
Avoid oversharing or placing blame on anyone during this discussion. Writing down a script of what you want to say ahead of time can also help you feel more confident while you speak.
Remind them you love them
While this divorce may cause a lot of big changes, making sure your children know that your love for them will never change is important. Some children blame themselves for this split. This fear can cause hurt feelings and confusion.
Speaking in a calm, reasonable tone can also help reduce anxiety in younger children. The more open you are to questions, the more likely your children will feel comfortable talking to you about this topic.
Let go of guilt
Feeling guilt or failure about the end of your marriage can leave you paralyzed with worry. You may even avoid talking to your children because you feel so embarrassed.
Instead, focus on the future and look forward to what comes next after divorce. Planning trips with your children or spending more individual time with each one may help you transition into this new phase of life.